Sunday, October 4, 2009

Life isn't so lively




I'm alive but I'm not living. They don't trust me to make the right decision. I'm not that bad am? Then why every time they say something I feel so worthless and unwanted. I feel like I'm just a hassle to them. I'm sure their life would be so much happier without me. I'm such a bit let down that I'll hide away so they don't have to see my face. They haven't seen a tear fall across this face in quite some time and they won't for a long time. I learn to comfort myself a long time ago because I knew they wouldn't. Its so sad that now I can't even tell them the truth. For fear they'll just get me on trouble. All I want is to be there for him but they don't care. They wouldn't listen even if I tried to tell them how I feel. But its not use fighting with them anymore it wouldn't help. Could I really take the leap and move? I'm so scared but it might come down to that. I just hope it isn't till I graduate. I just don't know to do anymore. How long can I pretend to be happy here without him? Only god knows and he brought god back to my life. We have gone through s too much to give up now so I'll just continue fighting my silent battle.

5 comments:

  1. i brought god back to your life?
    well im glad that just being with me is keeping you from giving up i love you so much baby, i will never give up

    ReplyDelete
  2. ya a lil. I was giving up on god but he brought u into my life. So he had to be real. I need u to be with me so bad! I'm just so scared I'm going to mess everything up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. you cant possibly mess anything up, your smart i know you will figure something out

    ReplyDelete
  4. ha why do people actually think I'm smart? I have no common sense

    ReplyDelete